The feelings of grief are not only when a loved one dies you can also experience the feelings of grief and loss from 40+other life events but here are some common and more known ones, divorce, retirement , losing your job, wishing your life had been different, moving home, children leaving home the empty nest, death of a pet, major health changes, end of addictions, financial changes – positive and negative, holidays, changes at work, redundancy. These loss experiences we have all had relationships with which we can grieve for.
The first time I found grief recovery I too thought it was only for those who had lost loved ones, little did I know the definition of grief and how other life losses also give us the experience and feelings of sadness and grieving.
Grief is emotions, and emotions come from our hearts not our heads. It’s these heart felt emotions where grief is the conflicting feelings caused by the end of or change in a familiar pattern of behaviour …BOOM!
Let me just repeat that …
GRIEF IS THE CONFLICTING FEELINGS CAUSED BY THE END OF OR CHANGE IN A FAMILIAR PATTERN OF BEHAVIOUR!!
Wow! When I first heard that I could totally relate to it, because whilst I was swimming around on my head with a roller coaster of emotions and deep sadness.. the absolute route to my grief and loss was my conflicting feelings of change because I now didn’t have the life I once had and the future destined from that 🌻 and it was that alone that I needed to consider… my behaviour, the behaviour of those around me before during and after my trauma and the impact of this behaviour on my health, well being and to be brutally honest, my mental state, and it’s these I needed to unpick and understand. After all no one teaches you how to grieve, we don’t learn about it at school, it’s not until it happens we have to get on with it and that’s when we hit the brick wall..
What I can tell you is that genuinely people want to be able to recover.. but the BIG question is how?
There’s a famous saying (don’t know by whom) but here it is….
IF YOU CARRY ON DOING WHAT YOU HAVE ALWAYS DONE YOU WILL GET WHAT YOU HAVE ALWAYS GOT!
So if you want change to your life however big or small you CAN have it, but you must be prepared to take steps to make it happen and they don’t have to be big mahoosive steps, because even the smallest steps contribute to recovery..
So my question for you ..If you could make one small change to your life to make it better what would it be?
A small but big one for me was to stop eating bread, because I felt lethargic and bloated, swapped to sourdough and the results have been significant 😀 I’ve even taken to baking my own, so a small action which has been consistently worked upon, works well, it excludes one offs.
You can start making your own changes here by signing up to my FREE mini course – JUST CLICK HERE!